The Day I Got Stepped On By a Horse

I have beautiful feet! I honestly do! At least I used to have them, until they got stepped on. My story begins when one fine day, our university decided to take us to the sea. The day was particularly exciting for me as it was the first time I was going to see the sea (ey that rhymes). So it was that I got on the bus armed with two things, my happiness and my beautiful feet. What follows is what happened to those two when I got there. So it came about that three of us friends were strolling leisurely on the beach enjoying the combination of wet feet and sweaty foreheads when suddenly out of the horizon rode out this rider, straight-backed, majestic stature, powerful horse. He came riding towards us. Ahh! I sighed dreamily; my knight in shining armor hath arrived! You’ll be my knight in shining armor • Shining so bright I can hardly see • The sunlight because of thee But wait, what’s this? The knight has a beard!!?? AND he looks ironically like the fat guy in the TV series “The sword of Tipu Sultan”. But Tipu Sultan wearing a shirt that says “I scored last night” excusez moi senor?? Closer inspection. Oh Lord! It was just a university guy on a horse. AND WHAT was wrong with the man running behind the horse. Why was he making such a racket? “Piche piche ho jao, ghora dewana hogaya, side maro baji” (step aside sister! the horse has gone berserk!) Oh great! The horse was out of control. The three of us scampered away like the three-not-so-little mice. Have you ever wondered why there are so many threesomes in fairytales? Like the three little mice, the three musketeers, the three little pigs, Goldilocks and the three bears. But I transgress, back to the story. Anyways we managed to escape. But alas! To my dismay, although I managed to escape my foot did not. The darn guy albeit horse and all stepped on it and marred its beautiful face forever. We all know that beauty is a binary thing, either you have it or you don’t, I no longer had it. Being students of physics we know that some things like voltage and current are directly proportional. Being profound thinkers (ya ryt!) we absolutely know that inner happiness is directly proportional to outer beauty. So to put it bluntly when beauty was marred, happiness was scarred and hence endeth this sad tale of “the day I got stepped on by a horse”.

Tags: beautiful feet, beauty, fairytales, goldilocks, horses, humour, karachi beach, pakistan, seaside, story of a horse, three little mice, three little pigs, threesomes